The five-star Mandarin Oriental Hotel, Knightsbridge, formerly the Hyde Park Hotel is “as tacky as a plastic Christmas tree in a spray tan salon”.

This is the view of Daily Mail TV critic Christopher Stevens, who gave a one star out of five panning to C4 documentary “A Very British Hotel”, claiming that the title was a hilarious misnaming on account of the fact that none of the staff shown were actually from Britain. This was, according to the GM, because “the work is too hard, the hours too long and the pay too poor to attract anyone but immigrants” Of course it wasn’t because the mainly very rich middle-eastern clientele who drop huge piles of money there are well used to being served by immigrants.

Stevens also opined that the programme proved that “A chav is a chav, no matter how rich they are” and that the hotel “looks like a cheap knock-off from Taiwan”.